Meet my pet Unicorn!!!!

So I have a pet unicorn. You know the fictional pony that has magical powers and full of rainbows and glitter and happy thoughts? Yes. That kind. Every woman has one, but their unicorn only emerges as they start trying to have a baby. Let me explain for those of you that are utterly confused...

My unicorn is mostly at bay every 2 weeks and then I get a positive Ovulation Predictor Kit (OPK) test telling me ovulation is eminent. This means we have approximately 36 hours to get as many swimmers up there as possible to hopefully catch the egg. Let the marathon of the most unsexy, pressure filled, but we aren't talking about how awkward the "sex makes babies" sex really is. Then the countdown begins. Whew! And there she is...my unicorn full of glitter filled thoughts and fantasies about how this has to be our month, then the fantasies about how we will tell our families, how will I tell my husband?, OMG Gender reveal party! - I. must. start. planning. This goes on for approximately 13 glitter filled days of nothing but baby. Obsessively searching stories on Babycenter of others who are experiencing "cramps at 7 dpo (Days Past Ovulation)", "implantation dips", and obsessively comparing my chart to others that got their BFP (Big Fat Positive). These obsessive bouts only feed my unicorn and she comes out roaring her head and shooting rainbows up my butt about how this is DEFINITELY THE MONTH!! This is about what she looks like at this point...



How amazing is that? Prancing around in all her baby making glory...Then comes 13dpo at about 8:30 PM Every.single.cycle. I get that pink spot on my TP and we all know what follows (I should be lucky as this is my warning and I shouldn't be surprised when the next morning my temperature plummets and I wake up to full blown Aunt Flow). But my unicorn doesn't stop there. While the temp drop and and blood should be enough to slaughter my unicorn for this cycle she still lives. She whispers things like, "you know that is probably implantation bleeding (IB)" and cue more obsessive searches containing "IB at 14 dpo" to find several stories of women who thought their period had arrived only to really be pregnant. Wow. She doesn't die so easily. Then by the next day, I've come to terms with the fact that my unicorn is a total deceiving, lying, horrible bitch! And this is what happens to her....







Yup. I think she's dead. I've slaughtered her. On to another cycle and eating all the carbs I can get my hands on until I can get motivated to give the next cycle my best shot and focus on that next positive OPK. Takes about 1 day and then positive attitude arrives.

This is literally what happens every cycle. This is the roller coaster of emotions we talk about. We have to make ourselves believe that every cycle it could happen. No matter the odds. We still believe. Heart break after heart break our unicorn always comes back and we always welcome her with open arms.